The Curse of Meredith Grey
by StarSapphire16
Summary: Derek was finally getting free of Meredith Grey. NOT for people who like Meredith! DerRose ONESHOT


Author's Note: This is very anti-Meredith so if you're a Meredith fan, you probably shouldn't read this. I simply cannot stand her. This is a one-shot and I don't anticipate writing anymore Grey's fan fiction. I just could not get over how selfish Meredith had been and how she's glorified for it, so I wrote this.

It was the end of another long day of work at Seattle Grace Hospital and Derek Shepherd still had a million things to do. He looked at the clock. 7:15. He'd just gotten out of surgery and still had some charting to do before he could finally leave and go to his much-anticipated dinner with Rose.

Derek turned on the radio to his favorite rock station and began his work. As he worked on the chart of his last patient with a bleed in his brain, he thought of his love life, or rather, his lack of it.

Just the day before, Meredith had told him that she did not want him dating anyone else. Not that she was ready to truly be with him, but she was going to try. Derek loved her, that much was certain, but after today's conversation, he wasn't sure if she truly loved him.

He kept hearing Meredith's voice in his head over and over. Earlier that day she had yelled at him for kissing Rose even though Meredith and he weren't in a relationship. It was when Meredith refused to forgive him for something he shouldn't feel guilty about anyway that Derek realized something: Meredith didn't love him.

Derek knew this sounded wrong, but as he mulled it over, he realized it was true. Meredith didn't love him. If she did, she'd want to make him happy like he made her happy.

And as Derek kept thinking about this, he realized that Meredith hadn't made him happy in such a long time. Everything between them had been about her. She didn't want him – she wanted the way he made her feel. She wanted to be wanted and needed, but right now, Derek didn't want her. And that made her upset.

Just then, there was a knock at the door. After a second, Meredith walked in. She looked around awkwardly and sat at the chair in front of Derek's desk.

"I know I'm not very good at this," she began.

"It's not that, Meredith," Derek sighed. This was going to take longer than he wanted it to.

"Look, I can't promise you anything, Derek. But in order for us to truly work, you need to be willing to stay with me and only me."

"Mer, I wanted to. I really wanted to. But you kept pushing me away."

"What do you mean, wanted? Are you saying that you don't want me anymore? I can't lose you, Derek." Meredith struggled to keep it together.

"You say you can't lose me, but you don't want to be with me either. You can't have it both ways, Meredith. I can't keep doing this to myself. Every single time that I think you might finally be ready, you shoot me down. I won't just wait around for you anymore. It's not fair to myself."

"But, what about me?" Meredith whined.

"See, that's just the problem, Meredith. It's always about you. You never wonder about my feelings. I loved you, but all you did was make me unhappy. You never thought about what made me happy. Kissing Rose made me the happiest I've been in a long time, Meredith. I won't apologize for it. But, no, I don't want you anymore." Derek's eyes were pained, but he realized that telling the truth was important. He needed to free himself from this unhealthy obsession on both their parts.

"Why not?" Meredith started to cry. She didn't want to admit it, but part of what Derek was saying was true. She just couldn't be without him.

"Because it's always about you. It's about how you feel or how you need time. I'm not getting any younger and I want a family. I loved you, but did you ever truly love me?"

"Of course I did."

"No, you didn't, Meredith. Because if you truly loved me, then you would have let me be happy, even if it wasn't with you. Love is selfless, and every single thing has been about you. You wouldn't let me be happy with Addison, and you started pulling away from me when I was with you. The only reason you don't want to lose me is because you don't want to live alone. I won't settle for that."

"This is all because of that nurse, isn't it?"

"No, Meredith, it's not about Rose. I didn't want to be with you before I met Rose, but Rose finally helped me put things in perspective. I can't be with you Meredith when all you're doing is using me to make yourself feel better. I know you have a complex about your family, but I can't take that away. You were horrible to your sister, but you kept turning to me."

"Lexie is none of your business," Meredith snarled.

"She is when you keep telling everyone to make her stay away. All she wants is to be your sister and you won't let her. It's not HER fault that your dad picked her over you and you need to just get over it already. Stop punishing her for something that wasn't her fault."

The room was silent. Meredith struggled to keep the tears at bay. She knew that Derek was right, but did not have it in her to tell him that.

"I have dinner plans," said Derek. "So I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

"So, we're done?" Meredith said.

"We're done," Derek said with finality.

Meredith walked out of the room and shut the door. As she left, Derek thought about everything he had said. He knew that he had been harsh, but he didn't regret it. He was finally free of the curse of Meredith Grey.

Derek picked up his phone and called a familiar number. "Hey Rose, it's Derek. I just wanted to let you know that I'm leaving my office now."


End file.
